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Wednesday, September 17
i just saw something which really, really shocked me.
technically, i shouldn't be offended or upset cos i had it coming.
in a way, i deserve it.
but still, my jaw just literally dropped & i think i stared at the screen for at least 2 minutes.
i expected this. but i didn't expect it to happen this soon. certainly not 48hrs after i did what i did.

i'm a pathetic excuse for someone who tries so hard to put up a front.
& all for what?
to end up feeling stupid & retarded & lonely & humiliated.

fucked things up. real bad. & i can't blame anyone else but myself. i think i left all my brain cells at the O'levels. i was stupid enough to fool myself into thinking i'm fine. i'll be okay. i should've known better.

i don't think i can believe in it anymore. promises were broken. & after this episode, i realise that those beautiful words previously spoken were, obviously, just words of.. sweet talk. nothing more.

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Agnes
Janna
Jeanette
Jillian
Josephine
Rachel
Ryan
Sherman
Shuyun
Yiling